An Arch Hall two-fer.
“Welcome to the other side of safe.”
MAXIMUM RISK (1996) sees Jean Claude Van Damme playing brothers (again) as he tries to get to the bottom of a plot involving corrupt cops and the Russian mob.
The most interesting aspect, of an otherwise routine film, is the scene where JCVD has sex with his dead brother’s girlfriend. There’s a moral and emotional complexity to this idea which is sadly, and unsurprisingly, completely ignored in favour of some routine titillation.
Command 5 / 1985 / E.W. Swackhamer
Explosive TV movie in the A-team vein, starring Stephen Parr, Wings Hauser and John Matuszak! Japanese VHS in English with Japanese subtitles. Full-frame picture (being a TV movie that is probably correct).
New review: CIA II: TARGET ALEXA (1993) Lorenzo Lamas stars and directs in this action film which separates the occasional bad movie people from the hardcore sadists. Find out which side of the line we fall in our review.
You’d think it’d be hard to make a bad film about a vampire Nazi trying to make Hitler immortal, but somehow Uwe Boll manages it with BLOODRAYNE 3: THE THIRD REICH (2010).
The most irritating aspect is that it could actually have been a decent, dare I say it, good film. However, the script is absolutely dreadful. Even when making allowances for the DTV realm this film is operating in, it’s terrible.
Clint Howard and Michael Pare may never win Oscars, but they’re decent enough actors. Unfortunately, there’s just nothing they can do with the mouthfuls of drivel they’re required to say.
Born a Ninja / 1989 / Godfrey Ho
Ho stitches another quilt together from 90% bad HK action and 10% Richard Harrison Ninja goodness!
New review: THE PEACEMAKER (1997) our reviewer has an awkward moment of self-realisation whilst watching this rather beige thriller: “It’s nice to know that, like the bottom drawer of my bedside cabinet, Clooney and Kidman also have things they are probably ashamed of.”
New review: We take a look at the ‘mockbuster’ 2012: Ice Age, parts of which may seem familiar to Roland Emmerich….
22 BULLETS (2010) stars Jean Reno as a retired gangster, who thinks he’s left his criminal past behind. But after he’s gunned down and left for dead, he hunts down those responsible in predictably brutal fashion.
All told, this is a disappointing film. The film does nothing to make you care as for the fate of any of the characters. Apparently based on a novel, it would be interesting to know more about the source material.
There are some hints within the film of plot strands which may add depth to the characterisation and story. However, they look like nothing more than nods in the direction of the source material, no doubt sacrificed in order to turn in a straight forward 2-hour revenge thriller.
I find it easier to forgive a film which tries and fails, than one which plays it safe and still fails. A dispiriting, pointless film.
Bruce Willis looks badass in The Expendables 2 character poster
Plus, 11 more posters revealed, featuring Sly, Arnie, Van Damme, Hemsworth, Norris and more…
